Femcels Are More Radiclized Than You Think.
Have you ever seen a woman respond to a man’s comments on social media by referring to him as an incel? At this point, it’s a pretty rampant and dismal cliche, an intellectual equivalent of using a toaster in a bathtub—that makes me want to pour acid over my face just to avoid continuing the conversation.
Any man who has dared to comment on a misandry-laden post filled with monotonous “rage bait” and baseless opinions that a 15-year-old could whip up is often hit with the label of “Incel.”
He could be married, in a relationship, actively dating, polyamorous, or just very sexually active, but that label is so loosely tossed around these days that it’s lost its meaning as to who actually is an “Incel.” Or what the term even means.
But there’s something new that has been slowly and gradually growing on all social media platforms. A group that has gone under the radar of the general public until recently, men and even some women are waking up to…
“Femcels.”
What does the bastion of the English language Urban Dictionary say?
“they are opinionated as fuck and not only hate men but also hate women; they hate everyone and everything.”
“A femcel is a woman who is involuntarily celibate. Femcels hate both men and women for different reasons. They hate men because they will not have sex with them and they hate women blaming them for taking all of the guys”.
“Female + incel. A female who is involuntarily celebrate. Typically because she has a repulsive personality or is physically unattractive. Many femcels are at risk of falling into the clutches of radical feminism or becoming a obsessively involved in a celebrity tumblr or twitter fandom”.
The term femcel is now in widespread use, not just in Reddit forums but on every major social platform, including TikTok.
Honestly, from these descriptions, it kinda sounds like some angry people in the comments. Or a lot of writers here whose only content is “Why we don’t need men” and “Men are trash.” Blah, blah, blah.
What have I learned in my research?
From my understanding, These are typically women who don’t feel sexually or romantically desired. Men don’t treat these women the way they do conventionally more attractive friends. They typically lack self-esteem or confidence. You can tell by the way a lot of these “writers” portray their articles with titles such as:
“Women should turn their backs on men.”
“You can’t teach a man; they’re all dumb.”
“Don’t give broke men a chance.”
“Women should never offer to pay for a date.”
“All men online are creeps”
“Is the saying “kill all men” really that bad?
Men Are Not Worth Your Time or Trust.”
“Avoid Men Who Can’t Handle a Strong Woman.”
“Why Men Will Never Understand Women’s Struggles.
They almost always get hit up with proposals of friends-with-benefits arrangements, one-night stands, or dates that involve them never being taken out in public. Thinking it might lead to a genuine connection. They never do.
Do they take the time to learn and understand why?
No.
They just have little temper tantrums on Reddit, Medium/Substack and TikTok.
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If they do end up having dates in public, the man will rarely, if ever, kiss her or hold her hand, even if he has flaunted his previous other girlfriends on Instagram. Now, please recognize I’m speaking in generalities here. I know femcels are not a monolith, but again, on the balance of probabilities, this is what you’ll most likely get.
This apparently happens again, again, and again.
Until something changes, enough is enough! They join a few Reddit groups and find a like-minded echo chamber of women who go through those experiences, too. Joining a Reddit group to solve your dating life is like forming a book club to get over a breakup—except nobody reads, and everyone’s still single.
These femcel communities have crept over into social media at a nice steady rate; they’re for women who lack romantic relationships as a result of a toxic blend of misogyny and impossible beauty standards but don’t worry, they’ll bash it over your head as much as they can that they’re happy like an emotional MLM. Trauma-sharing on repeat like it’s earning a commission
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Proudly waving the flag of independence yet secretly sending SOS signals for companionship is the mark of a 2025 Femcel. It’s essentially a female take on male “incels,” so-called “involuntary celibates” who, in general, feel entitled to sex with women — and resentful if they don’t get it.
Gross.
Most Femcels, however, believe that society systematically deprives unattractive women of love and respect, that the only way to “ascend” is through dramatic alterations to one’s looks, and most pretty people just have it easier. I’ve read a lot of these threads, and holy shit! The stench of loneliness is just brutal. I genuinely want to give all of them a hug and remind them that there is hope; I don’t mean that in a condescending way. The empathy I have died, however. When the issue they conclude is often “men are the problem.”
See ya:
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A self-defeating attitude is a deep black hole with no real way out; a lack of internal locus of control where any personal responsibility is all but lost is a very dangerous place to be and only digs your hole much deeper than it already was.
When other women egg that paradigm on and on, it all becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy. Navigating a self-defeating attitude is kinda like trying to paddle upstream in a river of thick molasses with a giant spaghetti noodle — it’s sticky, it’s slow and feels hopeless. I genuinely struggle to understand how people get so lost in this.
I saw a quote that said — “Seeing a young in shape beautiful women still makes me want to die,” a user called vcardthrow2 on a femcel forum called ThePinkPill.com, their Reddit forum, has since been banned for spreading hate, btw. People, not just women, have to deal with the genetic cards they were dealt with, shut the fuck up and just deal with it.
Some get kings, some get twos—either way, whining won’t reshuffle the deck. Fold, fight, or figure it out. I can’t fucking stand people who bitch and moan for the heck of it.
For some of these women, it feels like a personal attack on their own happiness because they are constantly barraged with what’s possible, the sort of destiny other women are seemingly offered on a regular basis.
Some femcels seem to wrestle more with forming fulfilling relationships—and from the outside looking in, the picture they paint feels stark. For many, sleeping with men who see no value beyond the physical can feel less like a choice and more like choosing between canned soup or an empty fridge. Survival—not satisfaction.
Can’t incels and femcels create that energy from rejection into something creative? Can’t they band together and offer each other a support group rather than tearing each other down? Or why not just date each other? Misery loves company, right?
They hate pretty women and the superficial nature of men.
This is where I think it devolves further into a nonsensical hate fest. For example, I’m bald, I’ve been shaving my head since I was 17 and I know that not all women will be into bald men - but it’s never stopped me from dating and having fun with great women. Jumping on forums to bemoan that fact I’m bald does NOTHING; IT HELPS NOTHING. But it creates and builds upon months and sometimes years of poor self-esteem. Instead, when I was single, I would always be pleasantly reminded that there are millions of women who like bald men.
I only learned that by putting myself out there and counting my wins instead of my losses. Look, any ship in the harbor is safe, but that is not what ships are built for. Because whining online about something you don’t like is like trying to fix a broken mirror by screaming at your reflection—it won’t change your face, it just makes you look even crazier.
Many femcels like to share their experiences on social media, moving through the world in an unattractive fat body, which sometimes disadvantages them romantically, socially, and economically.
Femcels find that the modern dating landscape — the image-based apps, the commodified dating “market,” the illusory “freedom” to be found in hookup culture — to be truly unnavigable, and they often cite a moment where they took the “pink pill,” and opening their eyes to the reality that society was misogynistic and “lookist.”
They always go back to the same tired and old argument to wrap up their rant.
“It’s the PATRIARCHY!”
Reheating yesterday’s coffee to serve as today’s fresh brew is all I seem to see. How do other readers not feel like they’re running on the hamster wheel of arguments, always ending up right where they started?
They need to wake up.
Society has been “lookist” since the dawn of time. This is not a new phenomenon. Attractive individuals are more likely to be hired and earn higher salaries. Physical attractiveness can influence judgments about a person's character and abilities. None of this should be new information to anyone who wasn’t born last week.
Unfortunately, depending on what genes you get, you must make the most and build upon what you have. I often laugh at the notion of it being related to the male gaze as if to say men are the only people who want to date and be in a relationship with a highly attractive person. They treat attraction like it’s a secret menu only men have access to, ignoring that everyone, regardless of gender, appreciates beauty in their own right — yes, even when binge-watching ‘The Bachelor.’ Imagine thinking the male gaze is the only gaze in town, as if women don’t also have their own version, meticulously curating Pinterest boards titled ‘Dream Wedding with Mr. Six-Pack Abs.
Knock it off.
“Lookism” is propagated by almost everyone. I’m not saying it’s okay, but I don’t know how useful crying about it will bring change. Every gender is guilty of this. Hell everyone in the world is guilty of this.
They’re not fond of feminism.
Well, more so, the performative social media pop-liberal-feminist notion of supporting all women and feeling positive all the time, no matter what! They’re very cynical of this whimsical, disingenuous movement cause not every woman wants to be a “girl boss.” Not everyone wants to feel obligated to support other women just cause they’re women.
For some femcels it’s almost as though they have a resentment toward the kind of feminism that challenged traditional beauty standards, mostly by asking those who fell short of them to feel beautiful anyway, regardless of their lived experiences.
I speak about this a lot, but people aren’t stupid. For example, when I was 80 pounds overweight and struggling to walk the stairs without feeling like I was running a marathon, all my friends who gave me compliments and said I looked good were liars. Cause my lived experience was completely different. No matter how much we try, looks will always trump.
Just look at this brutal reminder on the r/vindicta reddit forum- “Reminder to femcels, people who LIE to you and tell you that ‘you look fine the way you are’ are NOT on your side,” a moderator wrote last year. “They BENEFIT from you remaining ugly and not fixing your looks because it makes them more attractive relative to you.”)
A lot of femcels would much rather be able to talk about being ugly than just try to convince themselves that they’re pretty.
Man, what a way to view yourself and the world.
In some ways, that logic is even sadder than the original incel logic. Femcels feel the same gravity of “humiliation and exclusion” that incels do, but they react to those feelings differently.
For example, with men having significantly higher levels of testosterone, their online rants and musings tend to project anger outward onto society in hatred of women, and their anger is projected radically. This can be seen in their threats of violence or through absolutely bonkers calls for the government to “redistribute” sex.
Bruh.
I don’t know about you, but I fear incels more. They’re a legitimate threat to society, IMO. I’m not fucking kidding. Incels are bloody dangerous.
But when it comes to femcel discourse, it seems to come across as more inward on the self. For example, when we go back to society being “lookist” and unfair, femcels are not out to change it.
Why?
Cause they don’t see it as changeable.
Most women-only spaces want nothing to do with them.
They’re unwanted. They don’t always subscribe to the echo chamber of all women-only spaces. They did have a home and are tolerated in the notorious and deplorable Female Dating Strategy subreddit for a while, but were later kicked out. This is hilarious cause I think the female dating strategy users hold almost the exact same belief system. Just another run-of-the-mill man-hating Reddit group.
These groups all hold that same familiar hate, right? Incels, Femcels, and groups that just vent about how much they’ve been wronged by the opposite sex. These groups will slowly get a grip of your own sould to a point where you might actually forget what you actually believe in and what you truly stand for.
Are femcels born from the seeds of hook-up culture?
Sociologist Lisa Wade, PhD, author of American Hookup: The New Culture of Sex on Campus (Great read BTW), explains that one of the ways young men navigate the “hostile environment” of sexist hookup culture is to “treat women badly if they know they’re low status,” whether because of class, race, attractiveness, or body size.
Bloody hell.
Wade’s research shows these women are more likely to encounter rude or abusive treatment from men. This could very well be true. I believe that often times women take much higher risks when it comes to sex. Safety is a consideration that must be taken into account. That’s why I’ve never been a fan of hook-up culture. No matter how much some women say it’s empowering, it only really benefits a certain kind of man.
Man, that really sucks. Cause someone’s deemed more unattractive, they’re at higher risk. This legit blew me away.
My biggest concern with this community is some of the risky behavior they’re involved in. For women who feel lonely and want to be desired whilst simultaneously saying they’re happy being lonely and they don’t want or need a man, it has a very short shelf life and can take a slow-burning and very heavy emotional toll.
This leads to femcels occasionally taking less than they want while tamping down the voice in their head that demands better — a painful experience that many women, I think, can relate to regardless of their looks. Again, I don’t speak for women; it’s just a small suspicion I have.
I believe that for some femcels, not accepting bad treatment is an act of self-love, but it often will go further than that and become an echo chamber of hate for the men who have used, rejected, and wasted their time in the past. Or the men that might not ever give them the time of day.
Conclusion
Avoid these women at all costs, fellas. They’re miserable.
They might want to be nice, but they clearly have not dealt with past traumas. You’re not a free shrink or a psychologist, and no man or woman, for that matter, should have to take on a full load of someone’s emotional baggage. Some perhaps. But not all.
For any femcels reading this and hating my guts. I think you have three options.
Give up on love and society altogether.
Devote yourself to self-improvement.
Give up on men entirely.
You don’t have to give yourself to the pressure of locating happiness through sex and romance. The 21st century was supposed to bring a wider range of options than this.
Please know this. No one, nor men nor women, is obligated to desire anyone else; no one has a right to be desired. This facet of truth will help you in the long run. If you allow yourself to dwell in that ambivalent space all the time, you’ll regret it.
Try to take yourself out of this hole of despair and emerge having thought more deeply and critically than the other femcels about alternative ways of finding happiness and dignity, but on your own terms!
I want you to be happy no matter what path you choose.
Always choose to see life and humans in the best light. Anything other than that holds you back.
They are of no consquence, they can't shape the world like men
Every single image of a woman in this article depicts an above-average attractive young woman who would have zero problem getting a man.