She’s Hot? So Is a Dumpster Fire.
Having Zero Standards and Dating A Woman Just Cause She’s “Hot.”
Having Zero Standards and Dating A Woman Just Cause She’s “Hot.”
Some men are so fucking predictable it’s embarrassing. It’s like watching a toddler chase a pigeon, too much effort for something that was never interesting to begin with.
For example, I watched this video yesterday with a man who had to choose between 3 women. As soon as I saw all the women, I knew EXACTLY who he was going to choose.
Can you guess which one?
The one who had the biggest boobs and made sure they were fully on display.
I learned a long time ago that focusing on titties and ass instead of all the rest is a zero-sum game. Those assets will have you deluded and not thinking clearly. A man who thinks with his eyes will follow curves off a cliff because when you remove the sexual attraction out of the spotlight and really try to think objectively and rationally instead of romantically, that’s when your eyes are wide open.
It’s better to have some kind of metaphorical post-nut clarity before you actually nut so you’re not wasting any time or money. I’m serious. Love is best judged in the light of reason, not in the thick haze of cliched penis driven infatuation.
Look, I get it; you might look great with her on your arm. But the allure can be fleeting, leaving emptiness in those moments of both of you being alone together, especially when, deep down, she has the personality of a box of old dusty rocks. Like a sports car with no engine, fun to look at but going nowhere. I’ve been there, and once the sex was over, I kinda just wanted her to leave so I could play The Witcher 3. I’m not proud of this, but I had to learn the hard way.
According to a study by the Pew Research Center, 53% of single adults in the United States say that it is important for a potential partner to be physically attractive…but, but, but, the study also found that 63% of single adults say that it is equally important for a potential partner to be kind and compassionate and have some kind of personality rhat draws them in.
Dating a woman just for her looks is like ordering a gourmet dessert only to find it’s filled with 20-year-old rotting sawdust found in a moldy garage. At first glance, the dessert may be the most beautiful thing on the menu, but one bite and you realize the true flavor is something you wouldn’t share with your worst enemy, let alone digest. Yet, time and time again, men fail to really try and understand who she actually is.
I really don’t want to sound like a pedantic millennial when I type this up, but holy shit, we gotta start vetting these women more or else we’re cliched cavemen who simply let the penis guide us through dating like an automated GPS system. Or in this case, a DPS. When you hand the wheel over to your hormones, don’t be surprised when the road ends in a ditch that will take a very long time to get out of.
If you don’t choose with wisdom, wisdom will choose for you when it’s too late to undo the choice.
Let me tell you about Keisha
I know there’s a stigma with calling a woman crazy, so let me say this…
SHE WAS BAT SHIT FUCKING CRAZY.
I don’t care, she was. Sometimes I feel like she’s just gonna find me and kill me.
I met her at the SLC airport. I saw her walking into the same airport gate as me, and that bum was massive. I remember thinking I wanted to bite it. I purposely sat three seats away from her at gate 4C. So after about 5 minutes, I asked her if she could watch my bag whilst I popped to the toilet.
I came back, thanked her, flirted for a bit, and got her number.
I remember that after a day of texting back and forth, she sent me unsolicited nudes. It hadn’t even been 48 hours since I got her number, but I was an idiot, so I saw this as a good sign even though deep down I still thought it was a little weird.
We went out on a first date, had sex, and then just kinda would meet at random times in the week and hook up. Now, I have a strict policy about being honest and not leading women on, so I kept asking her after every session, “you’re cool just having fun, right?”
She would ALWAYS say yes.
Fast forward to 4 weeks later, she says…
You know what she’s about to say…
Keisha: “WHAT ARE WE?”
Me: We’re naked right now, as far as I know.
Keisha: Nah, c’mon. Be for real.
Me: We said we’re just having fun, right?
Keisha: I thought things had changed.
***I roll over and look her in the eye, and take a deep breath***
Me: Keisha, when did I ever give you the idea that things had changed?
Keisha: We went to the movies, you took me to White Horse, and we went to Oktoberfest.
Long story short, I had to end it there; I knew she was taking this to a place I never wanted to go, so I had to end it.
Here’s where she got bonkers. She would be at some of the Young Professional mixers I would host. She showed up to a book club I told her about when we first met. One day, I saw her at my gym, VASA!! At first, I thought it was a coincidence. But then she started showing up at my favorite bar, Lake Effect, in SLC. She told me she hates bars and clubs.
Here was the final straw…
She fucking showed up at my door at 2:24 am. I pulled out my 45.
Cause I didn’t know who it was at first. She claimed someone had broken into her apartment, and she needed a place to crash.
So, why am I telling you this?
I didn’t follow a protocol of judicious wisdom. I just wanted to have sex with a woman with a fat ass and nice rack, and I was punished for it. She was a five-star meal served on a trash can lid, very impressive at first glance, but ultimately, her mental foundation was pure garbage.
When you chase pleasure without prudence, you invite chaos disguised as excitement. I saw the red flags, I felt the warning signs, but I let lust hold the pen while wisdom watched in silence. The result? A full-blown catastrophe wrapped in curves and bad decisions and a lot of scotch and my face buried in those boobs.
A man who moves only where his desires lead him is a man walking blindfolded on a tightrope; sooner or later, gravity wins. Had I taken a moment to think beyond the moment, to see past the body and into the mind, I would have realized that great sex isn’t worth the massive wreckage that follows.
Lust is an impulse; wisdom is a discipline. Control the first, master the second, and you’ll never find yourself answering the door at 2:24 a.m. with a loaded .45, wondering where the hell it all went wrong.
Because a man who doesn’t choose wisely will always learn painfully.
I’m begging you to please learn from my mistakes. This woman was beyond a headache.
“Get the reps” - Here’s exactly what to do to avoid this.
1. Why Your Brain Betrays You
Science Says- Your Hormones Are Setting You Up
A study from the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology found that men become significantly worse at judging long-term compatibility when they are sexually attracted to a woman.
Translation? Your ability to think clearly drops the second you see a perfect hourglass figure.
Dopamine floods your brain when you’re physically attracted to someone. That’s the “feel-good” hormone that makes you ignore red flags and justify bad behavior.
Men in lust literally overestimate compatibility—meaning you think she’s “cool” just because she’s hot (and that’s a delusion).
This is why men end up chasing bullshit and calling it love.
👉 Fix this by:
Ask yourself: Would I enjoy talking to her if sex wasn’t an option?
Giving it at least 3-5 dates before deciding she’s "amazing." (Neuroscientists say your brain takes about that long to stop being blinded by lust.)
2. The “Post-Nut Clarity” Rule, Before You Even Nut
Vet Her Like Your Life Depends on It (Because It Does, kinda)
A man with no standards is a man walking into LA traffic with his eyes closed.
You need a filter, not just an open-door policy.
Women who rely solely on their looks often lack emotional depth, leading to dead-end situationships, drama, and attachment issues.
A University of Toronto study found that relationships based purely on sexual attraction tend to crash and burn within 3-6 months, right around the time the “new relationship energy” fades.
👉 Fix this by:
Assessing her character, not just her body.
Watching for early signs of neediness, instability, or entitlement.
Ask yourself: Would I want my future son to date a woman like this? If not, why are you even here? (Never mind, I know why you’re there.)
3. The “Keisha Catastrophe” Test Recognizing Red Flags Early
You’re Not in a Relationship You’re in a Psychological Experiment
Here’s what happened to me: I ignored red flags, misread compliance as compatibility, and thought I was getting casual fun. I was actually being auditioned for an unwanted role in her life.
🚩 Early Warning Signs of a “Keisha” Situation:
She escalates too quickly (e.g., unsolicited nudes, excessive texting after one date).
She mirrors your interests too perfectly (Fake compatibility).
She shows up in your spaces uninvited (Stalker tendencies, obsessive behavior).
She acts like you’re in a relationship before you ever agreed to one.
👉 Fix this by:
Keeping a slow and steady pace—no rushing into emotional or physical intimacy.
Setting clear expectations early (“This is casual, and I mean it”).
Cutting it off the moment you feel pressured into something you didn’t agree to.
Please try and prolong sex a little, no rushing.
4. The Wisdom of Selection: Pick, Don’t Be Picked
Men with no selection criteria are walking resumes for bad decisions.
Women are hyper-selective about men you need to be just as selective about them, have your set criteria, and STICK to them no matter what.
If you only think with your eyes, you’ll live with your mistakes.
So what does this all mean?
A woman’s body might turn your head, but her character should turn your decision. Always remember that lust fades fast, but a bad choice lingers like a bad tattoo, and tattoo removal is very, very expensive. The wrong woman will cost you more than just time—she’ll cost you your peace, slight sanity, and possibly much more, depending on who it is.
People will spend three months reading reviews for a $50 gadget but won’t spend three minutes vetting a woman who could destroy their entire life.
Smart men choose; dumb men chase.
Attraction is a factor, not the foundation.
Vet before you invest.
Control your desires, or they will control you.
A man who lets nothing but deep lust drive his choices will wake up in a brutal wreck he never saw coming - you’ll be virtually unrecognizable after it. Be the man who chooses wisely, not the man who learns painfully.
Your friend.
-Mav
My opinion? The best time to meet a spouse or life partner is during high school and college.
Anyway, I hope you're safe from Keisha? I want you here, alive and healthy, to keep writing them letters and sharing them experiences.
Mav, I feel you’re missing something here.
If she looks amazing just because of huge boobs and ass, okay, could be that you haven’t done your due diligence.
However, if she looks incredible because she takes care of her diet, works out, dresses classy, uses the absolute minimum amount of makeup to bring out her best, and moves and holds herself like a lady, then your purely aesthetic appreciation is also pointing to some positive traits and skills.
Also, just saying, but if you flew a girl from Salt Lake City to Munich, yeah, she might see that as a heightened level of commitment.